Valium...Ask for it by Name
I am not a proponent of taking drugs without a medical reason. But, my stress levels are at a record high, PMS is STRONG, and my mother's leaving is hitting me hard. So she gave me some Valium for the next couple of days. No biggie, only 3 10mg pills. Not enough to get a dependence. But right now....I need the tranquilizing effects. I'm not yelling at my kids. I am not hysterical. I am able to just relax and remain calm.
I wouldn't have taken it, but my prozac is getting me nowhere. My meditation isn't working. I listen to my rain sounds every night to relax and let the days events go. But things are just building to a dangerous level. I know...probably more info than you need. I have been praying nightly to be the kind of mother my family deserves. And right now, I am calm, I am attentive, and I am being patient. I am being the parent I want to be. That I can be, when my head is on straight.
I'm not going to do this all of the time. But for today.....I just need a break.
3 comments:
(((((((HUGS DENA)))))))
Don't feel bad for hitting the "mommy's little helpers" a couple of times, I've done the same more than once. No harm done. Just a little bit of calm for your nerves. We all need that sometimes and especially when we've gone through a loss, which you really have with your mom moving away.
It'll really be OK. Maybe go to your dr. and ask for something else for a little while. Call your mom a little extra~spend some cash on that phone bill for the next few months:) You deserve to talk to her! If only I could just speak to mine!! I've got sooo many questions and things I wish I could share!!
i am sorry that you are feeling down dena, i hope your spirits are lifted soon!
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