December is Here

It's December now. Christmas is sneaking up on us. Fast! I need a tree, I need to do cards. I need to decorate. I need to bake.

But I refuse to stress. If it happens, it happens.

The tree we will try to get this weekend after the yard sale. And if not then..later. One year, we didn't get our tree till Christmas Eve. Barry didn't want to use the fake tree. And there was always a reason we couldn't go cut one (family tradition). So on Christmas Eve, we went to one of those tree places on the corner, and surprised the kids by bringing a tree home. We had SO much fun decorating that night. It was also the first year that I relinquished control of the ornaments. I am very precise about where I place ornaments. I just decided to let the kids go. And it was HARD to do!

I wanted to have a picture taken of the kids by today for the Christmas cards. I took one picture, but I took it in the living room on the couch, and the blinds make a terrible background. Also, Emily's face is chapped and red. She is now healed. So hopefully I can do it tonight. Then I have to actually send them. I have made cards for years and I never send them. No reason why. Just never get around to it. Why can't everyone have email? Then I would send them no prob.

The kids have begun decorating. They are going through copy paper and tape like there's no tomorrow. I think this may be the extent of my decorating this year. I have tons of stuff to put up, but I just can't seem to get into it.

And finally, the baking. I need to do cookies for the neighbors. Why? I do enjoy this part. And it's fun to do with the kids. I will probably do this on Sunday after church.

Speaking of church, our Christmas party is Friday night. I don't usually go to these parties. I usually have a million other things, (work, sports, school) that conflict. But I had committed to myself to go this year. And now..I have to. Daisy has been asked to play an angel in the manger scene. My first thought when I got the call......SCRAPBOOKING opportunity! How bad is that??? LOL!

With December, comes the memory of a friend who died 12/8/84. It's been 21 years and I still cry. I can usually make it through the year, but when December comes, I remember Sarah and cry. She was a dear friend. She taught me so much. She was the first non-family, non-boyfriend, person to tell me she loved me. Because friends do that. But I had never experienced that kind of friendship before. She taught me that 2 people, who really don't hang out much and have different interests, can be friends. And we were. We weren't total opposites, and we did hang out together. But for the most part, our friendship was a bond of understanding. We talked to each other about things that our "crowds" wouldn't have understood. The only way I can really describe our relationship is, it was the type of friendship that mature adults have. But we were only 16.

When she died, Sarah was on her way from Duncan to Phoenix to compete in the Miss Teen Arizona pageant. Our friend Delyce was with her. It was foggy on the road that morning, and a truck coming from the other direction hit her car in a head on. The other driver had fallen asleep at the wheel, and the fog kept Sarah from seeing the oncoming truck until it was too late. Everyone involved died. I was friends with Delyce too, and grieved for her as well. But my relationship with Sarah was a rare and precious thing. I still miss her. And, to my deep and everlasting regret, the last time I saw Sarah...I didn't even talk to her. I was living in Tucson for that year, and was visiting Duncan for the weekend. I saw Sarah at the drugstore and we smiled and that was it. We were both busy. And that was the last chance we had together. The next week she was dead. We always, (especially when we are young), think that we have all the time in the world to say what we want to our loved ones. I know this has been said before, but I'll say it again. Never pass up an opportunity to tell someone you love them.

Wow! I didn't mean to turn so maudlin. It's a December thing for me.

December 18th, Cory will be 16. I remember being 16, so how can my child be 16? He has been on my nerves lately. He's going through another phase. I just keep praying for 18. I've heard it gets better after 18. If it doesn't, don't tell me. Let me live in ignorant bliss. He's trying to grow a beard. I love beards, but not on my 16 year old son. It's scraggy and ratty and barely qualifies for the word beard. But short of holding him down and shaving him myself, it's going to be here. And I am thisclose to holding him down! Seriously...I am a beard woman. Give me a bald man with a goatee and I am quivering! But it had better be a real man beard and not that fuzzy thing that young men try to pass off as facial hair these days. Thin, sparse, and patchy....NO! Neatly trimmed, with full coverage and filled in. Until a man can do that...don't bother.

I am rambling. I didn't sleep last night. I stayed up late listening to music. I haven't been through my mp3 collection in years. I was surprised by what I found. From 3/03, I have a copy of the original demo of Friend of a Friend by Dave Grohl. Why does this matter? It was written in 1992 by Dave, and is about Kurt Cobain. This is one of the few..only..songs that Dave admits he wrote about Kurt. And it was finally included on the new CD. I have had it for over 2 years and didn't even know it! DOI! I was listening to a bunch of old 70s & 80s sob songs. I sang. The kids left the room. And I felt my age. I am pushing 38. Not old, but when the songs I grew up with are labeled oldies, it makes me feel old. I listened to the Eagles, and Fleetwood Mac, and Queen. Some KC and the Sunshine band (don't tell anyone). And I stayed up till midnight listening.

So, how do I close this long and barely cohesive ramble? Like this!